growing up...

it seems like all of a sudden, the rest of my life depends on the decisions that i make right now.
when high school is over, and ive graduated, do i wait to go to college, stay here, and get an apartment to share with dylon? do i start working right away? do i move in with my dad and go to college? do i stay here and go to college? how am i going to be with dylon? how am i supposed to decide the rest of my life on what i know right now? it just doesnt seem like ive been alive long enough to make such serious decisions...
i want to be with dylon, thats one thing that im sure of.
we finally got to talk last night, for a couple of hours, we had mediocre phone sex...
it was alright.
he's expecting me to go to my dad's house, but then there's my job, and college, and everything else.
being 18 shouldnt have to be so hard.
my mom wants me to stay here, and live with her, and go to the community college,
my dad wants me to move in with him, and go to college there, my brother thinks that's a good idea, my boyfriend wants us to be together, in the same house, in the same bedroom, in the same bed, every night,
but what does AMY want?
Amy doesnt know...
amy knows that EVENTUALLY she wants to go to college, amy knows that she is going to have to work super hard if she wants to have enough money to go to school, AND have an apartment,
maybe...a roomate?
maybe...taking a year off to work, and save up, maybe picking up another job, maybe taking a math class right out of high school, maybe....maybe hoping against hope that my dad will let Dylon come and stay too...
we have to find dylon a job, and he needs a drivers lisence, and a job...did i mention a job?