Thursday, February 26, 2009

just another thursday?...or is it only wednsday?

havent eaten anything yet today, but i am getting hungry...should i eat? or just leave it as is?
i dont even know anymore...
im between who i was and who i want to be.
i know i dont want to be who i was.
ever ever again.
i will literally kill myself before i get that fat again.
i was walking with my ex girlfriend in the hallway about an hour ago, and i was squeezing the fat rolls on my stomach.
she looked at me and said "what are you doing? you're not squeezing anything, there's hardly anything there to squeeze"
and then she tickled me.
anyway, mom agreed to go to the hospital last night. we're setting up an appointment for next tuesday.
because im off of school.
but she says that before we do that im going to have to help her take a bath.
and yesterday i had to empty out the bucket that she pees in because she cant stand up long enough to walk to the bathroom.
shes not even 53 yet.
why do things like this happen to such young people?
things like this are the reasons why my belief in god is very...tested.
im not sure what to believe in anymore.
i want to thank all of my lovely followers that have taken the time out of their days to comment me, it means more than you know at this point in my life. i greatly appreciate it.
i love you all
i bid thee farewell
until it be morrow


  1. ahh that sucks terribly.
    im sorry youre going through a rough time =[[
    and i hope your mom gets better soon.
    or at least gets good medication and doesnt feel bad soon.

    stay strong!

    XOXO Sophia Ruins <3

  2. Wow, i'm sorry you're going through so much right now~ stay strong! I hope your mom feels better soon :) and thanks for following! it means a lot~~