Tuesday, January 20, 2009

ugh...fat cow!

ok, so i spent so much time reading through all of your blogs, that i dont have a lot of time left to post myself! lol.
me and dylon had an argument last night. i got selfish and tried to talk to him about how im feeling about everything, my food, my mom, and everything, about how i have trouble sleeping at night alone, and how im depressed.
and it took an hour and 20 mins. i know this because he told me. "i was only supposed to be on the phone for an hour and a half, and you spent an hour and 20 mins rambling about yourself"
makes me change my whole opinion of him.
when we first got together he was pissed because i put up a wall, and n0w i talk too much?
anyway, been eating like a cow since i started my job.
steak fingers, frito pies, hot dogs, and lots of diet coke, soup, bread, been neglecting water, veggies, fruit, and exercise, i feel like a complete failure. im probably going to go eat more after i finish this post.
im such a disgrace.
going to get it all back on track today!
not going to take money with me to work, therefore i cant afford to eat the crap there!
going to plan out every bite i put in my mouth!
going to start walking all of the time and get back up to 6 bottles of water a day.
started drinking carbonated, flavored water, its amazing. 0 cals!
with all of the 0 calorie drink choices out there, why would someone drink their calories?
dumbasses. tsk tsk.
im still disgusting and deserve to be locked away somewhere.
im hungry, AGAIN.

4 comments:

  1. You aren't selfish for talking to Dylon about yourself. That's what's supposed to happen in relationships. He's acting like a real tool.

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  2. Don't worry, the first couple of days in a work environment with food are always gonna be bingy. Really soon you'll be sick of the sight of it all and then you'll never want to touch it again. Speaking as someone that has actually gotten to the point of eating bits of peoples food before taking it out to them,(gross, i know) you will gain your self control back.

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  3. oh and as to 'how it works' i havent a fucking clue. I've spent a week restricting and dropped fuck all, spent two days eating over 1000 with exercise and suddenly im down three pounds. It could of course just be my body being slow to catch up but maybe there is something to revving your metabolism by eating little bits all the time. Lulu x

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  4. Work and restricting. Probably the worst combination ever. I am working between lots of take aways and supermarkets and it is a struggle everyday. The flavoured water is a great idea. I also drink lots of diet coke or tea with artificial sweetener. Not so very healthy, but the whole way we live isn't healthy, right?

    Concerning your bf: What a harsh comment he made to you?! I probably would have slapped him in the face for this.

    But well.. maybe it's just the way he deals with things he doesn't know how to react to? Men are sometimes very weird...

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